The Practice of Reflection
”The days are long, but the years are short”.
That’s what the mentor moms used to always say during the moms of preschoolers group I attended. They also said, “These years will be over in a blink and these little ones will be all grown up”.
I’ve noticed particular times that people often stop and reflect on their lives. Birthdays, anniversaries, and at the start of a New Year. These reflections may take place sitting around a table sharing stories, when making New Years resolutions, or while looking at photos at milestone events like graduations, weddings, and funerals.
What I’ve realized for myself is the importance of reflection as a more regular practice.
I try to take an hour once a week on Saturday mornings to consider the week that has just passed. I go on a walk and write in a journal. I think about what I have been grateful for during the week, what has been hardest, what I regret, what conversations stand out, and what surprised me.
If not once a week, I reflect at least once a month.
Looking back on all of the photos in my phone or dates on my calendar help to jog my memory. I’m continually surprised at how much I forget so quickly.
If you are a verbal processor, it might help to talk things over with a trusted friend. I meet with a spiritual director once a month (in simple terms, a friend who walks beside me on life’s journey). She takes notes and helps me remember from month to month what milestones have been crossed and how I have grown.
You may choose to reflect with a spouse, partner, friend, parent, teacher, or you may reflect privately. Regular reflection over time can help us remember what is important to us and what is not. It can also remind us of who we are, where we came from, and where we are going.
Not all reflecting is happy or easy. Sometimes we need to work through painful experiences, loss, disappointment, or failure.
Some people find getting away and taking a personal retreat a good opportunity to reflect. If you think about looking at your reflection in a pool of water, the water must be still in order to see clearly. When I step away from the busy stir of life and quiet my soul in nature, I find it easier to see.
